Moments and Memories…!!

September 11, 2010

WHO AM I…!!

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Secunderabad Railway Station…

4’o clock in the morning…

a chilly morningggggg…

it had rained whole day the previous day…. it was still drizzling… and it was breezy…

Rohit was waiting for the train to arrive… all alone… almost the only soul on the long, deserted and dark platform… it was another 20 mins for the train to arrive… and this wait made it even more deserted and even more dull…

There was a touch screen machine put at the darkest corner of the platform to know how much longer for your train… and Rohit had already exhausted all the options there… twice… But since no other mode of entertainment was available… he went ahead to try it for the third time… still 15 mins to go….

Beta… kiska intezaar kar raha hai…” – a voice suddenly called…  Rohit, kinda scared, looked back… there was a police person standing… Rohit reached his pocket to check if he has his wallet with driving license…. He had it… >**sigh of relief**<

“train ka uncle…”

wo toh samajh mein aa gaya.. is platform pe bus ne aana kaunn sa aayegi tere liye… ha ha ha ha…….. ” – GOSHHHHHH…. he was direct and satarical… i liked him then and there only 🙂 , “… kaun si train ka… kiska??

“sister ka… AP Express ka”

“ohh… itni subah bulaya hi kyun… kitni pareshaani ho rahi hai tere ko… kitni duur se aaya hai…

“kareeb 25 km duur hai uncle yahan se ghar…”

he he he… aur didi kahan se aa rahi hai… kopi aur train nahin thi ??

“nahin.. Agra se aa rahi hai… ek hi train sahi hai wahan se aane ke liye”

kya karta hai…

“job”

itni si umr mein kamaane laga… sahi hai… aur kitna mil jaata hai… kahan kaam karta hai……………………..”

and then discussion continued… a good discussion… it wandered from job to life to investment to insurance to  income tax to life again… waiting was less pain…

and then Train name was announced…

“Uncle… ab jaana hoga… train doosre platform par aa rahi hai…”

acha chal jaa… dobara aana toh milna…

“zaroor uncle”

kya naam hai teraa….

“Rohit….”

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh……….. HINDU hai….

and then there was a longggggggggggggggg silenceeeeeeeeeee……………… awkward………………………………………….

there was no time to wait for the silence to die… train was already here…………….. Rohit bent and read uncles name badge: “PHULLAR”… dunno why but he guessed he is MUSLIM………….

PS: after longgg time have something to put forward…. this reminded me of a line from book TAMAS i recently read. It was over communal riots : [i] “kabhi kabhi ajeeb lagta hai soch ke ki kaise naam ya pehnava badal jaane se aadmi badal jata hai” …!!

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January 1, 2010

The One With College… Friends… Work… Life… and MOMENTS…!! – 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mishra @ 00:12
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Just a very flashy review of what this year brought to me… actually a little too much of everything… so never wanna forget this…

Lived the best moments in college… some moments which define the worth of the four years we had in college…

had to leave friends… almost forever… (Remember one instance when Tirtha used to come to water cooler to fill his waterbottle at around 11PM during exams and then came into my room to say a ‘Hi…!!’… and then we discussed things totally forgotten… just that that ‘Hi…!!’ extended till 4 AM… everyday… and now its almost 3 months since i have heard him…) … So, left them… almost forever…

Had an AUSCULATOR’s farewell… (everything else abt this day is jst between 10 of us… all the arrangements… ANGARA treat… and that confession session that extended from 9PM to 7AM…)

Met another group of tooooo gooooodd friends: Swati, Shailesh Dewina, Ambika… , a little too early into job life… or a little too late in college life. As i say, kitna acha hota agar hum sab ek hi college se hote… and as swati always replies, kya pata tab hum dost hi nahin hote…!! Signed a pact that none of our fights is gonna extend beyond 1 hour. And this past has helped a lot, warna mein aur swati waqai mein dost nahin reh paate… fought a lot in these last 5 months… and laughed even more…. cracked jokes… saw each otehr crying.. longing for things perhaos not meant for us… made fun of collegues.. and wat not. Many a times i was the reason behind their tears… and many a times it was they who cried when i couldnt vent out…

learnt that HAKUNA MATATA and QUE SARA SARA are the two words that can reson anything going wrong in ur life…

took a resolution that there shouldnt be any contemplations in life… never… although this will make u sad sometimes… but then going sad is far better than being hopeful till the very end and see things going wrong… its always worth a try…

Started watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S. … and thankgod i did…

Read a lot of GOOD books…

For the first time had this amazing feeling of wearig something bought of ur own… Earned for the first time… amazing amazing feeling…

had days when i was happiest and saddest… in a span of 5 days…

Got a better affirmation that i shud be counsellor… or an actor… or an RJ… or anything but what I am today… convinced a friend to stay back at the last moment when she had decided to leave job… and many other times when i pursuaded people to do what they wanted to do…

Learnt how to cook… and for the first time, single handedly hosted a party for 15 people, out of which only 8 turned up… now with little assistance, i can make pulao, chawal, halwa, sevaiyyan, dal, aaloo ki sabji, poori, roti, chhole, pohey, sandwhich, gulab jamun, khichdi, MAGGi, noodles, daliya, sambhar and … and if nothing works out, i surely can call up Dominoes… 🙂

Learnt that being good always pays off…

started writing this blog… MOMENTS AND MEMORIES…!!

For the first time, celebrated Ganesh Chaturthi…

First time in life got gifts on Christmas… a sweet cute SANTA keychain… and a FRIENDS FOR LIFE mug… and another one is awaiting… sang christmas carols… hosted a farzi gameshow in office…

Not getting an invite to new year’s party was never so embarrasing… stayed back at home and only comfort was the timely calls from ghar and friends : sudky, dushy, ambika, gautam… and messages ofcourse…

For the first time my saying:  “we are single not by virtue but by choice…!!” is not what i can boast abt myself…

Got back in touch wid many long forgotten friends: shazia, mugdha. Made a lot of net friends : ani, gazal, anuja, ekam…

Also, i prepared a wishlist this yeat and trying to live up to it everyday… as said, no contemplations… and as a part of this wishlist only, i went to office in casuals last tuesday… extreme casuals, when the dress code is extreme formals…
but it was fun.. each and everything on the wishlist is… have completed 3 of the 30 wishes so far..

and there’s lot more… a lot lot…

many reasons y i want this year to end… and infinite others y i want this to continue forever…

and so, in the memory of the great year that is passing by taking away a lot i wanted to keep forever… and giving another LOT i wanna keep… forever… to all the people who ever mattered in my life… i just want u guys to know that:

“I will be there for u, when rain starts to pour…
I will be there for u, like i’ve been there before…!!”
in 2010 and for all the years to come… !!
*******WISHES********

December 4, 2009

AN UN-Grown UP…!!

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Few days back, a senior person came from onsite.. and we were having a formal introduction…

“Hi.. I am Anand..”

“Hello Anand, I am Rohit..”

“U must be a new joinee… a college hired…”

“hmm…. Yes… how come u know…??”

“It reflects from ur face… looks full of energy…”

This was something which makes me happy still… whenever i recall this conversation… makes me smile…

It actually feels good to be sort of urself when everybody expects u to mature suddenly…

For me, i am sure, this is not the kind of job i would choose for myself if given a choice… One reason could be that i have already experienced it and would like to change…

and that is how things go for me… i cant be a part of stationary… i prefer change…

right now, if given a chance to be something of my choice, i would prefer to be a Paedetrician… a Counsellor… a Radio Jockey… something which doesnt asks me to mature… which keeps ME in ME intact…!!

and when Anand said that my face reflects energy… u can understand why i was HAPPY…!!

i am not grown up… atleast till now…!!

November 3, 2009

Being OMNIPRESENT…!!

3rd November; 6:20 PM:

right at this moment…

i want to be in Agra, jaipur, hyderabad, ajmer, Pune, Mumbai, Delhi, noida, ghaziabad, bangalore, mysore, Ahemedabad…

I want to be with sisters, Family, friends, colleagues, seniors, juniors…

I want to be in school, college, office, home, on a trip…

I want to look at pics, browse thru messages, call up everybody, write a lot…

 

huh…!! GOD surely enjoys being OMNIPRESENT…!!

October 1, 2009

Song of HEART…!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mishra @ 19:57
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A_song_to_sing_by_takingoutthepast

 

A GOOD SONG is one…

with music… that penetrates deep into heart…

and lyrics… that penetrates into memories… even deeper…!!

September 26, 2009

FRIENDS…!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mishra @ 15:42
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friends  : They come in your life… become special… and then they leave u…

and u miss them… forever…!!

will miss getting drenched...!!

September 19, 2009

A waste of TIME…!!

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Hey buddy common, lets go for a coffee…

Hmm… 2 mins… coming…

Naah.. I am going…

Ohhk, go ahead…time waste...!!

Hey sorry if u felt bad… but seriously, I cannot wait for somebody just aiwei hi… I think its a waste of time…

<smiling> well, I don’t… anyways if I am coming for a coffee, i am not gonna do anything for the next 5 mins… so I prefer to spend those 5 minutes with my friends… a constructive waste of time u can say…

Hmm.. but then THAT is TOO girly… u wait for everyone… this caring attitude is actually very girly… u should be a girl.

And u a boy…!!

Definitely…!!

Anyways, caring for others is not girly… everybody has some expectations out of you…

No, nobody expected something out of u when u came here for the first time… its u who set the expectation…

And isn’t it good that the expectations set are good… ?? everybody must get a return of what they expect out of u… or what we can do is that someday I will neglect u like anything and then u will know… then u will feel bad… 

No I wont… see, I, many a times never ask u for a lot of things… but do u feel bad.. NO..!!

YES…!!

<smiling> ohhk.. u do feel bad… <smiles continue> I can not help it right, I am evil… and also I am not girly like u…

again, caring for those who care for u is not being girly…

Whatever…

Yeah… whatever… lets go…!!

August 29, 2009

THE FREEDOM WRITERS…!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mishra @ 20:51
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I did what i always wanted to do...!!

 

 

“Once there was a lion… and a mouse. Whenever lion was asleep, mouse used to come and dance on his chest… one day lion caught mouse dancing, but being a good lion, he didn’t hurt the mouse… and let him go.

 

They became good friends…

 

Days later, when lion was hunting for food, he got trapped under a net set by hunters in the jungle… then mouse came and cut the net for him and set him free…”

 

 “So, moral of the story is, GOOD FRIENDS are for LIFE…!! and that we must help others and then others will also help us”

 

 

WELL… sometime back when one of his friends told him that he is gonna leave his job to become a teacher, Rohit didn’t know how to reason him to stay back…

And now he doesn’t want to… not any more… now, after he knows that Teaching Is Infectious….!!

 

This Saturday, when a weekend followed after long long time… there were no plans to be executed… just that Rohit had volunteered to teach a class of students in a school where nobody gets an equal shot of destiny as he always had…

 

7th class in Vivekananda Public School, Hyderabad…!!

 

It was as good as it could have gone…

 

Rohit, Tarun and Sadashiv… an inconvenient group of teachers…

And an awesome gang of students… Nikita, Nadeem, Shivaji, Afreen, Hafsa, Bushra, Nazia, Nihaal, Ramulamma, Mansa, Rajesh, Ganesh, Deepak, Kaavya, Sarita, Niyaaz, Vijay… (m missing 3 names here)

 

The so called teachers for the day entered the class with no concrete plan in mind… they didn’t even read the day’s module. The day started with everybody’s introduction… and the platform was set…

Rohit got a first taste of Hyderabadi Hindi here… “apan ne sun to rakha hota ki kaisich hoti hai wo… par bolne me hichak hoti hai saab… par abhi apan mast tareeke se bol sakta hai…”

 

Later in the day,  kids were asked to write a story of their own… AND THE FREEDOM WRITERS WERE BORN…!!!

Every kid had something to write about… something they have sometimes heard of… some incidence in their life which is still fresh…

Those who wanted to write something different started with writing about themselves… where were they born… the description of the trips thay had managed with their families… the age they will get married… the no. of kids they will have… and  even the name of their kids…

All those fables we used to listen… the turtle- hare race, the lion mouse friendship, “respect ur parents” stories, “god is always there to help u” and “friend in need is a friend indeed” stories, Thumbelina… all were back for the narrations…

One narrated and other listened…

They got  to know that “NO” and “KNOW” are two different words… where to use “HUNGRY” and where to use “ANGRY”… and that if somebody calls u NOTORIOUS, what he actually means…

 

 

Among all those learning and clapping… dancing and singing… creation and narration…  the 2 minute long 3 Hours of celebrations was over…

All of them… all 20… came and shook hands… said BYE to the most inconvenient group of teachers they had ever met… and asked them to come back again next Saturday… “SIR NEXT SATURDAY AANE KA HAI… NEXT SATURDAY TEACHER’S DAY HAI…” 

 

5th Sept was never so awaited… Rohit is waiting…

desperately…

told u, this teaching is infectious…!!

 

 

 

P.S.> while i was writing all this, i got a message… SALARY FOR SECOND MONTH HAS BEEN UPDATED IN UR ACCOUNT… man… i am loving this day…!!

June 23, 2009

क्या भूलूं… क्या याद करूं…!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mishra @ 01:33
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Talked to my friend today… the same great girl I talked about in my KAASH thread… She was happy… very happy… today was her first day in college… IIM B… a dream came true for her…

The best campus…

Awesome whether…

Behatareen Rooms…

She was happy…!!

I kept asking her questions… and she kept answering… in full zeal… had too many of them…. And I asked them all…  she too was ready to answer each one of them… and she did…

And then there were tears…

Ek Kaash…!!

I never cried all these days over what has already been split… even the day when result was announced, I was sad, a little sad, but never cried… and today, tears won’t stop…!!

All those days when I was preparing (or when I kept myself and the world in the illusion that I AM preparing), it never came to my mind that I could fail… OPTIMISM or OVERCONFIDENCE… whatever…!! That was ME then… without negating any thing which could possibly go wrong at the last moment, I had this strong feeling that I cannot fail…!!

Everybody around got their reservations done for Hyderabad, to join Deloitte… but I waited… waited till the D day arrived… 10th April’09… I wanted reservations for Khozikode.

Till 10th, I was busy quoting facts about IIM K on long phone calls… somethings like “its god’s own campus in god’s own country”… the fee structure… the kind of life there… read blogs… fantasized things…

Till 10th

But as soon as results were out, I called up home: “mummy, hyderabad ke tickets karwa dijiye ab…”

But I didn’t cry then too…

And suddenly, today, these tears…

“how is everything in IIM…??”

“A dream come true Rohit…!!”

Tears were there…

“Rooms…?? Got roommates…??”

“Yeah… single room…!!”

I kept asking…. I kept crying…

She kept answering… she was happy…

I wanted to be as happy as she is… I wanted to find the answers myself…

I kept asking…

“Boys and girls have common hostels…??”

“Yeah… different floors though…!!”

 

All these days I kept telling myself that whatever happens, happens for good… but m insecure now… don’t know if next CAT is THE CAT for me or not… I made infinite tough choices… skipped NTPC and sat for Deloitte… I had my reasons for everything i did… the reasons I cannot claim to be any true now… m not sure of them any more… m insecure… daily I console myself that company is good… future will be good….

COMPROMISING has come into my nature…

All after 10th of April 2009…

Since then… for the last 2 and a half months, I never thought of it… I was virtually happy with what was happening around… hamesha achha hi hota hai

All these days I never cried…

But tears wont stop today… everything is coming back…

 

(and the same day, another friend of mine said: “yaar, m very sad for some reasons… bas ye samajh le ki IIM ki call aayi aur convert nahin hui…”

I sincerely wish, she is not AS sad as she said she is…!!)

June 20, 2009

I Wanna Live it All Over AGAIN….!!

Filed under: adieu,friends,loss,love,memories — Mishra @ 16:33
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“Oye.. aaj teri tone hi badli hui si lag rahi hai… bada khush lag raha hai tu aaj…”

“Hmmm… didi aaj friends se mila hun bahut dino baad”

Amandeep didi could make out from my voice… I WAS HAPPY…!!

 

Long time since college got over… 30 days to be exact…

They say, “time heals”… 30 days… m still waiting…

 

But something good happened lately… we met… the BURI NAZAR WAALE group of ours…

The long planned meet… the same old jokes… illogical discussions… leg pullings… sitting on the pavements… making fun of modern art… the same victorious feeling that no one in this world can withstand the kind of sarcasm and creativity we bring into everything we do together… the same old expressions saying “YET AGAIN” whenever something went wrong… and eyes going watery again with laughter on things that exclusively happened to us… it was like feeling college all over again… all fun!!

Metro walks… DTC tours… Akshardham queues… Museum pics… all moments!!

 

Not long and all of us will be entering a new world where none of us will have enough time to celebrate life the way we had been doing till date… CARELESS is the word… Soon, no one to discuss… no one to share… no one to adore… and no one to suggest… A completely new phase of life where one has to loose one’s self to make a name for one…

 

Huh… confusing…!!

Life….!!

 

And before we get into questioning “are we ready to step into the new world and loose ourselves”… an impromptu reply comes:

“As long as we are together, a ME will never be lost… there will be someone always few moments with whom will remind us of what we actually are…

That when we sang, ban ke sahara ek duje ka yun hi chalte chalein…we meant it…

That, we ARE… coz we are TOGETHER…”

 

At no point in life we lived in a moment when things were easy… or when there were no hard choices to make… there wasn’t a day when we didn’t feel the blues of being solitary… yet we smiled and lived… all coz we had few people who were always there for us…

 

Not everything will change… few things definitely will… but not everything…

the ways may change… but the quest for girlfriends never will…

the point of discussion may change… but pointless discussions will always grow…

the size of wallets may change… but the fights for a dime will always be there…

the prayers for “GOD… Y ME” may seem to seize… but the feeling of “Y ME” never will…

 

Hum na badlenge zamaane ki raftaar k sath,

Hum jab bhi milenge andaaz purana hoga!!

 

Life is tough… Fir bhi, isko has kar jeene ka… ek alag hi hai mazaa…!! 

 

 

 IMG_1660

May 23, 2009

IRONIC is life… and so will be the ways to LIVE IT…!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mishra @ 00:11
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“Zindagi mil ke bitaayenge… haal-e-dil gaa ke sunayenge,

hum to saat rang hain, ye jahaan rangeen banayenge…”

still remember the day when a group of friends… each one of them equally untalented… got together to sing this song on their college farewell… IRONIC…!!  singing “zindagi mil ke bitaayenge” on a farewell day… 

they blew it… seriously blew it…  many of them never had any experience of stage till that day… the experience was great… they laughed at themselves… on the officially last day of the college,  when everybody was expected to be in tears, they laughed… IRONIC…!!

then there’s this another day coming to mind when we had a never ending discussion on these lines by gaalib:

“humko maloom hai jannat ki haqeeqat lekin,

dil ko behlaane ke liye gaalib ye khayal acha hai…”

 

suddenly… all the IRONIES was resolved….!!!!

 

P.S.: humko ab bhi pata hai jannat ki haqeeqat lekin… hum zaroor milenge…!!

May 8, 2009

DAMN… I LOVE U…!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mishra @ 10:30
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>>Before u get into reading this, please read I WON’T LOVE AGAIN post…. This is a sequel to it…

Even if u have read it, go thru it once… pleeeeez….!!

DAMN.... I love U

“I love u Dhara…”

“kab se DD… I am committed… for 2 yrs now…”

“DD, promise u will be ther always… promise that u will help me…”

“I will, I PROMISE…!!”

A lot of promises were made… but none of them… none… were kept. A lot of believes shattered. Dhara feels like witnessing this conversation with DD everyday… and everyday she is lost.

She checks the calendar-11th June- huh, HER birthday… She always had troubles remembering birthdays. Every year on their b’day, DD never failed to call her up at the stroke of 12… He used to call her, then wait for Dhara to wish him first and replied saying “same to u dhara…”

Every year the first wish for Dhara came in this way:  “same to u”… a rare thing to hear on your birthday… but this happened every year… every year till two years back…

Thoughts flew back to school days. The first time when Dhara met DD, something told her that this thing between them, their friendship, is gonna last long- really long. DD never spared a chance to irritate her. She although showed that she has lost it again to DD and she is irritated, she loved THE DD’s ways of making her feel special. They always ended up fighting and patching up the next day only to fight again. If she didn’t see him for even a day, then it was not a day worth remembering.

They grew up together…

Dhara knew that DD will never be serious in his life… actually, he can never be… Moreover it didn’t suit him… he looked good only with a smile.

But the day when he said he loves her, DD was serious…Dhara knew it wasn’t a joke… that for the first time in his life perhaps, DD was serious…

She had no other option but to tell him that she was committed… how she was proposed and how she said YES…!!

Since then, there were no calls from DD… three years and 2 birthdays gone and not a single call from him…

She didn’t even know where he is now…

The boy who proposed her also left, without giving any reasons… ahh..!! thank god I had reasons to say NO to DD… And with him were gone all the promises whish he had made. That was the time when she wanted DD’s presence the most… but he wasn’t there…

She was alone…

TIME FLEW FOR HER… NO PROMISES WERE KEPT…!!

He got up… and replayed the same paragraph of the same song… for the nth time today…

Muskuraun Kabhee To Lagataa Hai
Jaise Hothhon Pe, Karz Rakhaa Hai…

Tujhse naraaz nahin zindagi, Hairaan hun mein…

and he  smiled again… for the nth time… today, on his b’day….

Well, job was fun… an all together new experience but nothing less than the fun of sitting idle in hostel for hours. He was the most sought after companion to have for lunch time- all thanks to his instantaneous jokes and spontaneity to react foolishly to any situation… He smiled a little and made everybody laugh… the same daily dose of humor was still intact.…


His dressup would never go with the kind of personality he is….

Today was no exception…

Dressed in suit, looking like gentleman, he looked exactly opposite the way he actually is. A smile on his face, hair not combed properly… and with a red rose tucked to his pocket, he was the talk of the office… today, on his birthday…

There was a grand party for the office colleagues… host was DD and the reasons were double fold… one of them being his birthday…

Smiling and happy faces all around… it was virtually an off day…

But, among all these smiles, among all his friends, he was still searching for a special wish… he was missing Dhara…

DD wondered if she even remembers it is her birthday today… Dhara was bad at remembering birthdays…

He was missing her… today, on their birthday…

Haah…!!! the same memories… the same joyful moments of togetherness… the same painful last two years… the same never ending wait for a response….

All started to come to him in flashes… again…

Since the D-day, life was never same for DD…

Everything looked deserted…

The only thing he wanted from life… for life… was not his, and the rest mattered least.

Whenever something good happened to him, he so craved that she was around…

Whenever something bad happened, he wanted her all the more…

But she wasn’t there…

He was alone…

Every night he expected dhara’s call… there was none.

Every hour he tried her… no replies.

He had to quit…

He knew that Dhara feels he was not the kind of guy she would like to spend her life with, and he feared that she will never know the truth…!!

TIME FLEW FOR HIM… HE LEARNT TO LET GO…!!

The long-long day was over… DD wanted some moments in isolation… public gatherings still irked him…

The party was good… and celebrations for the day were over… A lot of surprises made this day an unforgettable one…
Walking along the pavement, he was noticing every face that he came across. Every face had its story…

A kid screaming just coz he was denied another sip of cold drink… A couple standing in the deserted corner, girl crying and boy with stern looks… A lady, 50 something, walking alone and murmuring to herself… a beggar, an astrologer, another girl having golgappe… the pavement was full of faces tonight, each with a story… everyone seemed to have one… or at least he could make one from each one of them.

Wait… the voice was heard before… the voice of the girl having golgappe-

He moved towards her… long hair…

He moved closer… fair complexion

He inched closer  and… oh my god…!!

“DHARA…!!” he exclaimed

It was hard for the girl to look at DD’s face coz of the glare of the lights from behind… but that was not necessary… she recognized the voice…

MY GOD…!! Dhara… its u… of all the people in this world, its u…

HI…!!”

“Hey DD… hello”

“kaisi hai yaar…” he was breathing hard…

“mein bahut achi hun… tu bata…”

“yahan kya… matlab Hyderabad mein kyun… matlab kya kar rahi hai yahan… matlab tu to shayad delhi mien thi na…” words were not coming out properly… DD just hoped that they made perfect sense…

“Mein to yahan kisi project ke kaam se aayi hun… abbey, main Radio Mirchi mein RJ hoon… Delhi mein… tu yahan kaise…”

“Bhool gayi, arey mein to yahi kaam karta hun… Deloitte…”

“Jaise tune mujhe bataya tha… remember the last time we talked… its over 2 years now…”

“2 years, 3 months and 2 days to be exact…”

A silence followed… very unlikely of them… it continued for long… very long…

Dhara broke it…

Dhara: by the way, HAPPY BIRTHDAY…

DD: aah…:)… same to u yaar

And here was the first wish of the day for her… coming again from DD…

DD: chal chalte-chalte baat karte hain…

till when are u here in Hyderabad..??

Dhara: Not long, perhaps 2 more days… but it won’t be possible to meet u, will be very busy…

DD: 😛 I didn’t ask u to meet me… still try if u can take out time??

Dhara: DD, tu badla nahin yaar… the same way of saying things u want as if I want them to get done…

DD: pata hai…

Ye bata, wo banda kaisa hai… jisne tujhe propose kiya tha…

Dhara smiled… she had no answer to this… the boy was long gone… she didn’t even know where he is now…

DD too got the answer… he knew how and when to stop asking questions… As always, Dhara never had to say everything… yet everything was understood.

DD: hmm… rehne de… samajh gaya… ye bata, tu theek hai na… mein us gadhe ke bharose tere ko chhod ke gaya tha aur wo bhaag gaya…. GADHA…!!

Dhara: hmm…

DD, do I need to tell u that I missed u… all these days… U never answered my calls DD… no messages… kyun?? just coz, u thought that boy was there…??

Ohhk… must be network problem then… she too tried… it wasn’t that bad atleast…

DD: chhod un baaton ko… ye bata, hw was today…

Dhara: huh… can’t say. Till 30 mins ago, it was the worst b’day of my life… but now it is the most cherished…

DD: hey Dhara, u talk like an RJ… u know how to flatter…

Dhara: how was yours…?

DD: Great… you were the surprise of the day… a lot of surprises today… u were best among them…

Dhara: surprises like..??

DD:  like this one from my family… I AM MARRYING…!!

Dhara: WHAT..!!! girl of ur choice…??

DD: nah… arranged…

Dhara: tu arranged maariage kar raha hai.. u always had dreams of love marriage…

It must be coz of her that DD has agreed to this arranged marriage…

DD: I WILL LEARN TO LOVE HER…

She was supposed to be happy… she wanted to be, but she wasn’t…

The guilt increased many folds…

He will LEARN to love her…!!

Can I now tell him that I LOVE him…Now I realize ki of all the things in this world that ever mattered to me, I need him by my side most of all, can I NOW tell him this. Will that make any sense to him… will that change anything now…

And why, now, suddenly when he is getting married, sharing the best moments of his after D-Day life, why does it feel like a loss to me… Did I ever ‘not-loved’ him…

I love him… I surely do…

Oh god…y did we meet…!!

“tune baat ki usse kabhi… jaanta hai…”

DD: hmm, ek baar baat ki thi… achi bandi hai… u will like her…

Dhara: DD, its a great feeling for a girl to get proposed… to know that there is atleast someone who feels for her… who loves her truly… understands and appreciates her… and will continue to believe in her forever…

Before u marry her, ek baar propose karna, she will feel special…

DD: 🙂 yaar, pata hai these are the reasons why I missed u all these days… tere suggestions nahin ho to mera kya ho… will surely do that… and will tell ya…

Vaise, you are coming to the wedding… Agra mein hi hai… 29th ko, this month….

Aayegi na… kitna bhi busy ho, please aana… I want her to know each and every person who made this life worth living… I want u two to meet…

Dhara: ofcourse… pakka mein rahungi agra mein aur tere se contact karungi… tu mere ko pick karne aa jaayega na apni shaadi ke din… 🙂

DD:  koi shak… tu apna naya contact number de…

And the conversation continued for few more hours…

I LOVE YOU...!!

Dhara left Hyderabad the very same day…. Some jobs were still incomplete… but then they didn’t matter much…

TIME FLEW FOR DD and DHARA… LIVES WERE TO CHANGE….!!

28TH JUNE:

Dhara on a call: Mummy, m NOT coming to Agra tomorrow…

.

.

.

Haan, tomorrow is still a holiday but I have to pay for some delays I had made earlier… I have to stay mummy…

.

.

.

Haan, sure…  I will… Bye…

29th JUNE:

Her cell kept on ringing…. 17 miss calls…

She left it that ways….

And it started to ring again…


He had been trying her for over 4 hours now… the contact number was wrong perhaps… huh…!! So the only way of talking to her was lost…

He couldn’t do anything…

He had to quit…


HE took vows for the life ahead…

SHE cried for the loss…

LIVES CHANGED FOREVER…!!!


April 18, 2009

Life is BEAUTIFUL…!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mishra @ 16:19
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

  

 

LAST MOMENTS TOGETHER...!!

LAST MOMENTS TOGETHER...!!

 

 

Hamare Agra mein ek kahawat hai… “Laut ke jaate waqt Tajmahal ko peeche palat ke nahin dekhna chahiye… warna bande ko dobara aana padta hai Taj ko dekhne…”

 Kuch log is baat par vishwaas karte hain aur Taj ko palat ke nahin dekhte…
Kuch log is baat par vishwaas karte hain aur Taj ko peeche palat ke dekhte hain…

Last days of the college… Last days of being master of yourselves… a jack of all.

Time slipping by… not many moments to let go… days are hot again this summer… only more memorable… the long way back to hostel and the scorching heat doesn’t pain us as much as it did in the last 3 years… nights are different… y am i getting insomniac wih each passing day… each passing moment…!!

A lot in mind… a lot to express… so many people to talk to… lot to talk about… hard to express… but even harder to conceal… THE LAST DAYS HERE IN COLLEGE…!!

Before coming to college, a Bhaiya of mine told me: “Rohit, these days are going to be the best days of ur life…”.
I couldn’t help but smile: “Bhaiya… ghar se achha kuch hota hai kya?? Kaise katenge ye 4 saal??”

And today, when i was counting the days left here, these words came to me in flashes… KAT GAYE 4 SAAL… pata bhi nahin chala…
I used my fist to know the number of days in the month of April… god knows when i did that last… counting days in the month of April. And alas… just 30 days…!!
picked up a calender and looked again… 30 days in April there too… (and when i am writing this, i am counting days again… no mistake. APRIL HAS 30 DAYS)
so, it was official…
Just 28 more days of being together…
28 days of knowing what life is… what it can be… what it will be…!!

Want to write lots… seriously a lot of stuff… many thoughts come to mind in a moment and the next moment, mind is blank. Things are changing… changing rapidly… !!

Very lately, we had a lot of endeavors…. a lot of plans… some materialising into trips… others into blogs and some more others into blue day, kurta day, white day, Thanksgiving Day, Birthday… hours of hanging out together… nothing to discuss, yet a lot to ponder… Suddenly campus seems to be a place we belong to… suddenly friends are the assets we will have forever, we will need forever… priorities getting their place in life…  responsibilities glaring at us… but are we capable enough to handle things our way…??

Every time I cross a road, I run into a vehicle… so I cross roads with friends… par ab kya…??
In a group of 10 friends… in the first year, only 1 knew how to get reservations… and remaining 9, in their fourth year now, still dont know the art… But now, they have to… This time it kills them to ask their ‘the’ friend to get reservations done for them… they have to learn it themselves…
The chicken that never knew how to cross a road, has to cross it all alone…
Things are changing… changing rapidly…
We have to learn things…  and learn them the hard way- the life’s way…!!

Khair, the point is I don’t know what to write… or ‘what all’ to write…

Every moment is a start of a new conversation… conversations about how we met.. the ragging days… the love life… the long stories behind nicknames… aur bhi bahut kuch- seniors… girls… friends back home… sisters… family… school… teachers… playground…
huh…!! a big story to narrate… few listeners… and an awesome narrator… always…!!

Few more days to go… and soon all will be over.
A few more days to say thanks for a life that changed drastically in the last 4 years, yet with so much of originality still intact…
Just a few more days to say a SORRY for all the wrongs we did… to show gratitude to all those who came in our life and made it BEAUTIFUL…!!

Few more days and it will be time to wind up…
All the michievious acts we did and everything we wanted to do… soon it will be time to put a full-stop to all those kiddish ways of living.
A few more days of doing what we want to do before we are forced into doing what we are destined to do…!!

a song is playing now in my PC… and it seems so apt:

“ek hawaa ka jhoka aaya, toota daali se phool…
na pawan ki, na chaman ki… kiski hai ye bhool…
kho gayi khushbu hawa mein kuchh na reh gaya..
mera jeevan kora kaagaz… kora hi reh gaya…”

kiski bhool….?? hum bichad rahe hain to kiski bhool…?? sab chhoot raha hai to kiski bhool… hum dukhi hain to kiski bhool…??
haah..!!

Maine kabhi kisi ko rone nahin diya apne aas paas… poori koshish kii ki sabko samjhun aur samjhaoon… hamesa hasta rahun aur hasaata rahun…
But when its time for me to cry… when i will need somebody to wipe off my tears… i find none… Everybody has to go… destiny calling… par kiski bhool…??
All I can do is wear a smile and ask others to say goodbye to the best chapters of our lives… Be glad not that those we love are to go forever, but that the earth they laughed and lived on was our earth too… that we had few people we loved and adored, and that through various gestures we have showed it to them…. that they know it too…
Tears over this end…??
Nay,a smile .. 🙂
That we walked together a little while…..!!!

I do cry… i wanna cry more… i will cry lots…!! But all this behind a thin veil of smiles…
AAKHIR, har hasi ke peeche khushi hi nahin chupi hoti hai na baabu moshai…!!

I don’t believe in that kahawat thing about Taj… magar yun hi… ek baar peeche palat ke college ko dekhta hun roj…!!
Wanna come back here… although i dont believe the anecdotes…!!

When it will rain this year… i’ll miss the nostalgic smell of soil… cricket… bhutta… chai… those long walks in the rain… those hopes of the rain ruinng classes of the day…

the Summers next year… will remind me of the long walks we had… the tough project times… the shades we craved for.. the long waits for the bus…

Winters this november and december… will be deadly… with noone around to offer me a quilt…

Every new trip.. will be a gentle reminder that the ‘stylish’ way of clicking pics and posing for them is over… only ‘gentleman’ pics… life is over… Ihave lived it for myself… clicked it throughout…

Every appreciation at office will remind me of all the swearings from the friends… which were the most genuine gestures to tell me that I am special…

Whenever I will have a punctured bike… i will miss people with whom I had dragged punctured vehicles for miles at 4:30 in the morning

A holiday… will make me miss my gully cricket…

Every funny incidence… will make me miss AUSCULATORS…!! they love the way I exaggerate things and frame them into a story…

Whenever I will have any amount more than 1000 bucks in my bank account…. I would wish to be back to college…. I will miss this place…

Whenever I will see a BOSS, i would crave to make fun of him… and at that moment I will miss friends… the blog… The SAMANT…

Whenever someone will address me with a Mr., I will miss being addressed as KUTTE… DD… GADHE…

Whenever some one will call me Rohit… i will miss being called Mishra…!!

I will miss LIFE…!!

LIfe is BEAUTIFUL… y cant it remain this way always…!! 

 

 

 

April 16, 2009

Life widout you, is not a life at all…!! I MISS U FRIEND

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mishra @ 18:34
Tags: , , ,

 

y did we fight...??

IF THINGS  HAVE TO END, WHY NOT END THEM GRACEFULLY… ITS ALWAYS BETTER TO LIVE IN THE MEMORIES OF THE MEMORABLE PAST WE HAD TOGETHER THAN TO BE IN CONSTANT PAIN OF PRESENT…!!
SOMETHIMES ALL IT TAKES IS A NUDGE…!!

EVERY MOMENT THAT IS ALLOWED TO PASS IS A MOMENT OF TOGETHERNESS LOST FOREVER….!!

 

The story is about three best friends- Raj, Teena, Anjali… in KG class…
Teena and Anjali were best friends from nursery… long before they ever knew what ‘friendship’ is- together always…

Then in KG class came RAJ- and the friend circle widened.
Three of them had their ways of handling things… their jokes which were undrerstood only by them, their standard of sarcasm which none other than the three can withstand… and they were happy that ways…

Suddenly, there was a wave of misunderstanding and things started to change… there were less talks and the group was no more a gang. They weren’t comfortable in each other’s company.

The winter vacations followed- playing with other kids was no fun… they missed each other…

Schools reopened… each one of them wanted to talk now.

Anjali: Teena, mein tele che cholly bolna chahti hun… yaal, is baal chuttiyon mein bilkul mazaa nahin aaya…

Teena: haan yaala, mein bhi bahut bole hui… pata hai, ich baal padna pada, koi khelne ke liye aata hi nahin tha ghal pe. Anjali tu guchha hai kya mele che…??

Anjali: pagal hai kya… mein bhi to nahin khel payi ich baal… ab jo bhi hua uche bhool jaate hain, aul kal che fil se ghal-ghal khelte hain. Raj ko dekha kya…??

But Raj didn’t come to school that day. They asked his neighbor Aman if he knew where Raj is?
Aman: “Wo to chala gaya… Ushke papa ka transhfer ho gaya… ushne kaha hai ki wo tum logon ke bina bahut bole hua is baar chuttiyon mein…
yaar, tum logon mein ladai hui thi kya… kyun..??”

Silence followed….

None of them knew…
Raj, Teena, Anjali… THE best friends forever… didn’t know what bought them together… and what parted them forever…

Anjali and Teena will miss Raj… they never knew that it will be so easy to be together again.
and Raj is already missing them…!!

 

April 10, 2009

Kaash…!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — Mishra @ 13:04
Tags: , , ,

can things go better… last 50 hours of my life were the best ones…friends-firever

an awesome treat by Chetna for all the bad things we had done to her hair on her b’day. it was a gr8 gathering- a lot of pics, a lot of talks and an awesome food… this was followed by a night out for the preparations of big… A THANKSGIVING for two most special people in this world… Prachi and Suman.

And it was too good… amidst all the lies that were said.. “kurta day ke din cake kaatna…”, “meri friend ko saari gift karni hai…”, “mere ko Nishtha se koi zaroori kaam hai, phone no. do…”, and many more…!!

A Thanksgiving for all the smiles they had brought with them in electronics batch… and all the hard work loaded with the zeal to do something good for them finally paid off… And they cried too…!! Pata nahin kyun, its getting tougher with each passing day- picturing the last day in college… We will cry…!! and miss each other, so much..!!

Hhair, this was followed by a wishful wait for some result… result was negative.. 😦 couldnt sleep at night in the wait… amidst the wait it was time to wish another best girl a “happy bud-day”. result was out today morning and two gr8 guys were entering two best colleges… Chug going in for IIM A and bud-day gal Bhavna for IIM B…

And then Icing on the cake… Pamecha aur Ashu ki farewell ki masti… and  Avesh getting a placement in FIAT…

seriously, can thing go better…

bas ek Kaash… 

kaash mera bhi ho jaata … kaash ye sab aise hi chalta rahe hamesha… kaash humne ye sab pehle shuru kiya hota-masti and all… kaash ye din yun hi chalte rahein.. kabhi khatam na ho…!! KAASH…

“kaash… mujhe kabhi kaash nahin kehna padta…!!”

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